10 Simple Ways to Make Life More Fulfilling — Today
“Happiness depends upon ourselves.” — Aristotle
Most of the lessons that I’ve learned about living a better life kind of suck.
They don’t suck because they don’t work, they suck because most things that you need to do to live a more fulfilling life take a long time to implement. They require discipline, focus, and hard work — sustained over long periods of time.
The most powerful life lessons that I’ve learned are actually tough love in disguise.
But happiness is different from fulfillment. Happiness doesn’t have to take so long to be applied to your life. You can have joy and happiness today.
Heck, you can finish this article and do almost everything you need to be happier within an hour or 2.
Happiness comes down to the actions that you do on a daily basis, and these 10 simple actions will make you feel better about yourself almost instantly.
Having discussions with people who you disagree with.
Arguing gets a bad rap.
This is because most people don’t know how to argue properly.
When you argue with someone, you’re not supposed to attack their character. You’re not supposed to let your emotions dictate the words you say.
You’re not supposed to leave an argument feeling exhausted.
Discussions with people who disagree with you are crucial for learning the validity of your ideas. Learning to stand up for your ideas will give you self-esteem, confidence, and if you need it, a reality check.
Maybe just don’t do the arguing online.
Pushing yourself to failure.
Exercise does something paradoxical to our psyches.
Exercise breaks us down physically, and that breakdown builds us up emotionally. At first glance, this doesn’t make sense. The micro-ego death you get from pushing yourself to failure in the gym should hurt your self-esteem (and in the short term, it does).
It breaks you down, but in the long term, it builds you up.
Easy is hard, hard is easy.
Go sprint until your lungs can’t handle it anymore. Go jump on a pull-up bar and pull until your arms give out.
I promise you’ll feel happier afterward.
Some activity that destroys your ego.
For me, these ego-destroying habits are writing and doing Jiu-Jitsu.
When I write something on the internet that performs so poorly that not even my mom reads it, I feel humbled. When I go train Jiu-Jitsu and I get my ass handed to me, I feel humbled.
It’s easier to be happy when your ego isn’t running your life.
Treating yourself like a lab rat and your experiences like an experiment.
This is one of my focuses for 2023.
I’ve been a bit of a creature of habit for the last 2 years — writing and training every day — and this has left me very little time for new experiences and new knowledge. Life has gotten stale because I’ve only been doing things that are “working”.
“If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,”
This flawed logic. You should always be trying new things in some way.
It may not be “broke”, but that doesn’t mean it’s the best for you.
Cutting people out.
I have a history of people-pleasing.
I used to do whatever it took to make my romantic relationships work. I’d do whatever I had to to make new people like me.
I, like a lot of kids, dealt with bullies, so as a young adult, I just wanted to fit in and avoid conflict.
Now, however, I’ve been doing the opposite of people-pleasing.
The opposite of people-pleasing is directly removing people from your life. I call it “people displeasing”.
If you can do this, you’ll free up new space in your life for people who are actually aligned with you.
If someone is sapping your happiness, stop giving them access to you.
Talking to strangers.
It’s one thing to have the courage to cut people out of your life who are holding you back.
It’s another thing entirely to go out into the world and find new people to associate with. I get it — in today’s world, it probably feels like it’s kind of hard to make new friends.
Here’s the truth: making friends today isn’t objectively any harder than it used to be. People today are just more socially anxious than they used to be.
If you go out and talk to strangers every day, it will become hard to avoid making new friends. You’ll also become more confident, happier, and you’ll learn more about the world.
Cooking food you love.
This is another new thing that I’ve been adding to my life this year.
Cooking is a mindful experience, and if you can carve out the time to cook new recipes (as opposed to eating the same things every day or eating out), you’ll learn to be more mindful of what you put into your body.
This will make you healthier, happier, and, to top it off, a better chef.
Reading stories from people who inspire you.
I’ve been enjoying a lot of Sahil Bloom’s Twitter threads lately.
Sahil is a great writer, but what really inspires me is how curious he is. He’s always trying new things and keeping his life interesting, and simply sharing what he learns along the way.
I love this, and these kinds of stories inspire me to do better and live better myself.
Daily deep work on — a passion project.
Not all work is created equal, and the work that you do on passion projects (things that excited you) is 10x more valuable.
You only have a few hours of deep work in you per day, so make sure you make them count.
Make sure that every single day, quality work is done toward your most important goals. Work on your blog, your book, Jiu-Jitsu, or your YouTube channel — whatever lights your heart on fire.
Making time for personal interests is a better act of self-love than any bubble bath.
Throwing money down toward a goal (skin in the game).
In Jiu-Jitsu, the biggest tournaments in the world usually require you to throw down money, fly across the world, and put yourself out there.
This isn’t free.
You have to sacrifice money, pride, and time, and go take some goddamn chances.
Guess what?
If you don’t take chances, life stays the same.
Let’s find out what happens if you do take them.
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