Why Everything Sucks
Is it you or is it them?
I’m going to be completely honest with you:
Doing Jiu-Jitsu full-time is not “a job”.
I can tell you this because, although I do Jiu-Jitsu full-time, I have also had “jobs”. I’ve had a freelance writing business. I’ve worked for a ghostwriting agency. I’ve worked in a restaurant. I’ve been a camp counselor.
Despite being a full-time grappler, I don’t really think of doing Jiu-Jitsu (and competing in it) as a job. It’s something that I am blessed to be able to do.
A bad day doing Jiu-Jitsu is better than the best day at a normal job.
And yet, without fail, every few months for the last several years, I have had periods in my training where the sport feels like a chore. I’ve had periods where there’s anything I’d rather be doing than my favorite thing.
I want a break, but I’m in an unusual predicament where it’s one of the only things in my life that I can’t really take a break from.
Today, we’re talking about burnout, fun, and building for the future.
Every week, there are only a few things that I have to do.
When I quit my last job writing for the agency, I was extremely overwhelmed by the complexity.
The job itself wasn’t hard, it was exhausting. The exhaustion I felt made me overwhelmed, stressed out, and more likely to make mistakes.
When I was finally free, I decided to embrace simplicity. For the last few months, this has been very important to me.
I’m focused more on doing a few things extremely well as opposed to doing 1 or 2 things decently well. I’m focused on excellence in a few domains instead of mediocrity in a bunch.
Every week, there are really only a few things that I have to do to keep this thing going and growing:
Write my newsletters (3-4 articles, 1 hour each)
Write my social media content (less than 2 hours per week)
Work on long-term creative projects (1 hour per day, but not all the time)
Train hard (3 hours per day tops)
Learn new information (1 hour per day)
And really, that’s it. With the exception of one-off projects here or there (like my current weekly column for FloGrappling), there’s not too much going on.
I quite like this way of living and working.
Simplicity is the antidote to burnout.
Whenever you’re feeling overwhelmed in life, one of the best things that you can do is to simplify as much as you can.
Burnout is often, like many other mental ailments, caused by your expectations and reality not lining up. You’re working too hard and not getting enough results, so you get frustrated and burnout.
The solution is simple tasks.
When I’m depressed or anxious, the way I pull myself through it is by embracing simplicity and finding joy in small things. Learn to appreciate the endorphins after a workout. Savor your food. Sip your coffee slowly.
Most importantly, you need to develop the ability to appreciate small increments of progress.
Increments that the average, results-driven person would miss. Mindfulness is found in finding a sense of presence in small moments and small observations.
In Jiu-Jitsu, when I get burned out of training, what pulls me through the acute stages is an added appreciation for the sport. I work to embrace Jiu-Jitsu from new angles, be it teaching, from the perspective of a fan watching old matches, or simply just learning new techniques on the mat.
The reason that I sometimes struggle to enjoy myself is that there are too many things happening in my world. A full life is good but it can become a busy life which is less good.
Practical ways to integrate more mindfulness into your life.
When I’m preparing for big tournaments in Jiu-Jitsu, like ADCC Trials or now ADCC, the biggest thing for me has always been to learn to turn my brain off.
When I don’t, I get stressed out over small things, I spiral, and I start to resent Jiu-Jitsu for “consuming” so much of my life. I get overly emotional because I am anxious and exhausted.
What helps is not “powering through” in these cases. If anything, powering through extreme exhaustion (not acute exhaustion) is part of the problem. Instead, I have to rest and fill the time with other things until I can work hard again.
Rejuvenation is an active process — it doesn’t come from staring at your phone. I try to do things like:
Going for walks
Reading books
Taking naps
Cooking food
Writing in a coffee shop
All of these activities are energizing for me. I don’t feel drained after them.
In between training sessions or recovery days from hard sessions, doing these things helps me stay active and mentally aware without actually putting myself through more of the stress that I get from hard training or work.
Closing Thoughts
Jiu-Jitsu ages you.
When you look at a lot of the top grapplers in the world, pretty much all of them look a lot older than they actually are. Pictures of me from my white belt days versus pictures of me now are pretty horrifying.
This sport has been hard on my body and hard on my mind, and it continues to test me every single day that I push myself in it.
Likewise, trying to run an online business brings its own set of stress and challenges. This life that I have created is stressful. It’s exciting and full, but it can also be a bit stressful.
If I focus on that — if every article of this newsletter becomes about how stressed out I am — we have a problem.
The thing is, in the same way that you can’t develop muscle without hard work, stress is the building block of a strong mind. It’s a good thing.
You just need an outlet.
Today, I gave you a few of mine, and maybe that can’t help you find yours.
The Grappler’s Diary is sponsored by BJJ Mental Models, the world’s #1 Jiu-Jitsu podcast!
This week’s episode features Charles Harriott! Charles is a BJJ black belt, professional seminar instructor, and content creator.
In this episode, Charles introduces a mental model he calls “the 3-fold view of Jiu-Jitsu.” We discuss the three lenses through which Charles views Jiu-Jitsu and how these different perspectives work together to help him better understand the art.
To listen, look up BJJ Mental Models wherever you listen to your podcasts or just hit this link.
A Chicago man, in Chicago, wearing his Chicago Brolo?
Is there a better combination?
Deep dish pizza and beer? A tavern-style pie and pop?
I’m not sure.
But there’s one thing I am sure of:
That Brolo distracted you long enough to make you forget about my messy hair, scraggily beard, and dorky smile.
Don’t you want a shirt that solves all your problems? A shirt that people care to look at more than you?
I hope so.
You can get it 10% off if you click the link below and use “Chris10” @ checkout.
Also published this week:
If you enjoyed reading this article, share it with friends! Or, click on the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Substack!