Why Your Best Is Never Enough

A lesson from German folklore.

Dec 13, 2024

A wintery night in Austin, Texas — Photo by MJ

When I was 19, I became very ambitious in the world of Jiu-Jitsu.

I saw the best competitors in the world posting about their wins online, traveling the world, and being worshipped — almost like gods by people who loved Jiu-Jitsu.

This was enticing.

I wanted this for myself. Like most 19-year-olds, I felt pretty insignificant in my life. I’d wrestled in high school and wasn’t very good and I knew I wanted to give more to sports, so this led me down the path of obsessively training and competing in Jiu-Jitsu.

At first, I really enjoyed my ambition. I relished it. It gave me purpose and made me feel important — long before I got any wins or success on the mat.

Jiu-Jitsu has since broken me down, built me up, and then broken me down all over again. The Jiu-Jitsu lifestyle goes in cycles.

Today, we’re talking about the trap of ego satisfaction.

But first, the tale of Faust.

Don’t ask me how I came across the story of Faust, because I don’t know how these stories find me half the time.

I think I read a Twitter thread that made me do some Google research that led me down a YouTube rabbit hole, and then here were are.

Either way, I recently stumbled across this story, and I realized it’s so heavy in our world today — our world of extremes and excess.

Imagine a man who has everything you could imagine an ambitious man wants. He’s a world-renowned scholar, brilliant mathematician, and philosopher. For our purposes, he’s also a Jiu-Jitsu black belt and a dominant competitor. He wins nearly every competition that he signs up for.

But one night, wrestling with insomnia as he fantasizes about eternal glory, he realizes that all of the knowledge and power that he has will never be enough. There will always be someone smarter, stronger, and more powerful.

There will always be someone who can beat him in Jiu-Jitsu.

So he decides to make a deal.

He decides, in the heat of passion and after probably a bit too much Jägermeister, to summon the devil. God, when you call for him seems to never pick up, but the devil is always just a phone call away.

“Please allow me to introduce myself, I’m a man of wealth and taste,” sings the devil.

“Yeah, I know who you are,” says Faust, “Listen up.”

Faust goes on to propose a bargain for the devil.

He proposes unlimited knowledge, experience, and Jiu-Jitsu skills — in exchange for his soul.

The devil smiles and agrees. Faust doesn’t know it, but the devil has heard this one many times before and he has captured many souls this way.

What the hell does this have to do with Jiu-Jitsu?

Many of us are tormented by the desire for excellence.

I know I am. Before many major tournaments in my career, I have struggled to sleep for days on end because I feel unable to stop pre-playing ideas in my head of what could happen that weekend. When I am deep in a writing project, I struggle with the same “demons” — there’s probably a Faustian reason why we call them that.

But these desires are natural. They are human.

It’s very human to want power, knowledge, and excellence. There is nothing more human than wanting to understand yourself.

The problem is extreme self-importance. To put yourself on such a pedestal that you believe that you are free from the human condition of not knowing, failing, and feeling lost.

What’s funny to me is that things like social media exacerbate this across domains.

I see writers online doing $10 million per year and I think I’m terrible because I’m not. I see some grapplers winning every competition and think I’m shit because I don’t. I see someone traveling the world all the time and I think that I get FOMO because I have so many places that I haven’t been to.

What if I could just trade who I am away for something better? This thought — this obsessive perfectionism — plagues our society.

What happened to our boy, Faust?

In the end, Faust fucked up pretty much as bad as you can and he still got “redeemed” and went to Heaven.

Catholics, am I right? (It’s a joke, don’t get mad 😅)

So you might not have summoned the devil and made a deal with him, but maybe you’ve been rude to people in the pursuit of your goals of knowledge, power, or dominance. When you’ve done this (I have), you may realize that for even greater knowledge, you need to fuck more people over.

I’m not saying that every successful person is a bad person who screws people over. Not everyone is making what’s called “a Faustian Bargain”. That said, I can think of a few.

To pursue greatness, you need to make sacrifices. I think that’s true. Our culture loves to tell people to sacrifice great things to pursue their goals — but this isn’t a Tony Robbins article, this is a hipster grappling guy who just wants your Jiu-Jitsu and your life to suck a little less.

What if the thing you’re supposed to sacrifice to have the best experience is greatness? What if you won’t be happy or content as long as you’re sacrificing everything to be great? This is the lesson from Faust.

What if, instead of lusting after knowledge, power, and dominance, you focused a little bit more on being good to the people in your life?

Being good to yourself. Being good to your community.

You can be great without making a deal with the devil. You can be excellent even. You can get your black belt, win championships, and excel on the mat and you can do it your way. You can be righteous.

If our society is going to have any chance of survival, we must believe this.

Closing Thoughts

When I was 19 and became obsessed with being really good at Jiu-Jitsu, I went on a path where I made lots of mistakes.

People in the Jiu-Jitsu community probably don’t see some of my choices as mistakes because the Jiu-Jitsu community is very success-oriented and hustle-obsessed, but I’ve been thinking about this a lot for the last 6 months or so.

Sometimes I worry that Jiu-Jitsu is not as good for me as I thought it was.

It’s made me stronger and more successful than I was, and it’s given me a platform to talk about stuff, but is it really “good for me”?

But that’s not because of Jiu-Jitsu — just like the thirst for knowledge was never because of knowledge for Faust — it’s because of me. Another key lesson here is personal responsibility.

The good life (and the good Jiu-Jitsu experience) are about making good choices. Being kind. Being selfless. Using the knowledge that you do acquire for improving your community or your family or whatever that “bigger picture” thing is — and I do believe you need something like that.

So to end this weird article where we talked about my stupid 19-year-old self and a tale from German folklore that I learned about a couple of days ago, this is all I want to say:

Whatever you do, do it well, but don’t forget what really matters.

‘Woj Lock the World’ T-Shirts are live! Discount codes and more…

If you like my new DVD or just like Woj Locks in general, this T-shirt is perfect for you.

Lightweight fit, available in white, black, and gray, and look at that artwork!

Shirts are available on my website along with tons of other cool merch like coffee mugs, travel mugs, and more!

Also, this week only, if you use “WOJLOCK10” at checkout you get 10% off the entire store!

Get your ‘Woj Lock the World’ T-shirt today if you haven’t already.

The Grappler’s Diary is sponsored by BJJ Mental Models, the world’s #1 Jiu-Jitsu podcast!

This week we’re joined by Ken Postnikoff! Ken is the black belt head coach at Confluence Jiu Jitsu and a longtime member of the BJJMM community.

In this episode, Ken introduces the concept of “reluctant leadership,” or how to be the leader your community needs when leadership doesn’t come naturally to you.

To listen, look up BJJ Mental Models wherever you listen to your podcasts or just hit this link.